This was a rough morning. It was bound to happen. Everybody, except maybe Eli, is in a bad mood. The long days, continuously going, going, going, and then Disneyland, morning to night, wore us out. Today, we are supposed to drive to Kings Canyon National Park, but before we leave, Amber is trying to squeeze in laundry. Unless, we want to wear dirty underwear (and none of us do), it needs to be done. Because of grumpiness and being tired, we are at odds with each other. It bothers me enough, that I need to walk away, be by myself. We are family, we love one another, but that does not mean we don’t at times say hurtful things to each other. Why do we do this? When we are tired, our filter and restraint are less. We get annoyed easier. In some ways it reveals to us parts of our human nature that can creep out if we are not careful. To love means life together, and life together is not all roses. Because we love, we confess, say I am sorry, and forgive. These are necessary activities in love. Sometimes, we need a moment. Sometimes, we need to process. Sometimes, we need some time to ourselves, but we still love and share life together. Reconciliation does not happen in an instant. We have feelings to work through, things to let go. But in love, we go through this process over and over again.
Thank God for grace, and the love, grace, and forgiveness that God bestowed on us through Jesus. We all need it. It’s humbling to let forgiveness take hold. It’s humbling to go through this process of reconciliation, but it is also love, and love is life together. This is discipleship learning to forgive and be forgiven. Maybe this is where the greatest courage of discipleship is found, looking into ourselves, honestly. Again, thank God for the love, grace, forgiveness found in Jesus!